Greenflme912

Hey so I've been thinking a lot about this, and I thought it was about time I brought this to the table. I don't have any means of digitizing my art, but I've had a lot of plans and intentions of making a Steven Universe comic lately and I was wondering if anyone would be willing to help me out with making it a digital work. It would be a collaborative piece and we would both put the same amount of effort in. It's okay to say no due to the lack of ways to pay you (due to me being out of a job) other than through pieces I would make you every time we completed a page. It is also understandable if you don't want to participate after reading the content of the comic. I don't want to give out too many spoilers on this yet because I haven't put pen to paper in terms of drawing at this time as I still want to make some edits and plans for it with the help of someone else. I'm not expecting anyone to accept this, but it's worth a try.

What I would be asking of you

• Once I were to finish my sketch, you would be able to have the final piece done within the next 9 days

• You to critique the writing or set up of certain things

• To be in constant contact with me on updates on your progress or any questions you wanted to ask

• Be willing to work on this as a project instead of a job

• Share a passion for working on it

• Let me know if it's too much to work on/if you'll miss a deadline

• Let me know immediately if you want to stop working on it

What I am hoping to include in this comic

• Darker Themes

• (Possibly) Self Harm

• Mental Health Problems

• Trauma

I'm basically asking someone to work for free on this dark comic with me. I want this person to have the same amount of passion for this kind of project as well. Again, I would understand if no one wanted to place this kind of work on themselves, but I want this comic to look as amazing and visually appealing as possible with our shared skill-set. I can't do that by myself. Please comment or send me a note if you are interested, and please share this if you can.

Thank you for reading,

Marshall R.

I've gotten notes from some old friends recently saying things along the lines of "you've changed" or "you're different than you used to be" or even "I don't think I can be friends with the new you".

Yeah. I have changed. I know I have.

I started this account when I was 11 years old and couldn't draw a damn thing to save my life. I am now 16 and I've been through a whole lot of hell since then. I had to change. I know that I'm a lot meaner than I used to be. I know I don't answer people as much as I used to. I know I snap a lot easier than I used to. I know I go out looking for a fight to have with anyone who is willing to tear me down so I can know that I'm right about myself.

I know I'm not the same kid who started this account. That kid didn't even know who he was yet. He wanted an outlet because he had no friends at school and was being abused at home. He was starting to question his sexuality and how it went against his religion. He wanted everyone to love him so he made things for people when he didn't even have time to make things for himself anymore. He did things he didn't even understand because he didn't want to be alone all the time. He was a pushover and he was quiet and he never wanted to fight with anyone out of fear that they'd leave him.

Yeah, kid, they left us anyway.

When people started finding out how fucked up I actually was, all of a sudden, I changed. It's my fault now. I'm so mean now. I'm angry and hurt and that's my fault. I can't talk about my problems or what's going on in my life because it scares people. I can't share my thoughts because people think I'm out to get them when I refer to ideation that I would never act upon. You think that's my fault all of a sudden? You want to sit there and tell me that the things that have happened to me, the things I've been through, the things I think about; that's all my fault? Yeah. Sure, okay.

I can't change anyone's mind about me. I refuse to try and change myself to please people I'll never meet face to face. I don't care what people think about me anymore. I'm a teenage boy with enough going on in his life without things here making it worse. I needed approval when I was younger. I needed acceptance when I was younger. I needed someone to talk to when I was younger and I had no one. I had Deviantart. I thought that I was okay to share what was going on not because people cared, but because I could get it out of my own head. If you have a problem with that, that's not on me.

I don't care if you have negative opinions about me. Share them, if you want. I don't need you to respect me. I don't need you to think of me the way you used to. I was young. I'm still young. I am just a kid. I always have been. I don't really think I have changed, not going to lie. I just got more comfortable in my own skin. I found outlets. I got angry at the world. I started hating myself a lot. I wanted to be myself and express my thoughts. If you think that these things make me mean, that's fine. Maybe I am. But it's not my fault if you keep talking to me, thinking that you're going to change me, and end up getting pissed off with me. Maybe I am stubborn, refusing to change myself for you. Or maybe you're the one who is selfish thinking that I, as an individual trying to be happy in his own skin, have changed just to hurt you or get back at you.

Say what you want. It won't change who I am or what I do.

I'm opening up some emergency commissions for a friend's birthday. These will close once I have enough money for their gift, however, if they are requested again later, I will consider opening them again.

10 slots open right now

I can draw

Humans

Anthros

Most nudity

Animals

Fan Art

I can attempt

Muscles

Gore Art of any sort

I can't draw

Fetish Art

Extreme nudity

I only do traditional work right now, my drawing tablet broke in November

I apologize for any inconvenience to you

Headshots are 400 points or $4

Chest/Abdomen up is 500 points or $5

Full-body art is 650 points or $6.50

Depending on complexity of the characters, price range may vary

+1 character is an extra 400 points or $4 minimum

I know that these will be considered expensive by most people who will see this but I have been working long enough to understand that an artist's time is very often worth more than they sell it for and I think this is true with all artists. My artwork takes hours to create, outside of the time it takes to have the motivation to draw and the hours of sleep lost to the work. Again, I believe this is true for all artists of every sort. Even now, time is precious.

Thank you for your consideration

Guys listen I gotta be completely honest with you, I hate this site as of late

The thought that I still have it and am still getting people who visit my page and watch me thinking I will ever post here again makes me sad

I'm active on my Tumblr account, however

@ bigolsadness

I post some of my more dangerous work and thoughts, but it's something

I can't stand Deviantart anymore

But I do still greatly miss my friends and if any of you have tumblr, I would ask you to follow me and reach out to me there instead of here

Because I am no longer going to be here, I thought I would do something considering I still have points that I will never use

I will stay logged in for 24 hours starting when this journal goes live

Hit me up with commission offers and I will get back to you as soon as possible

I will let you know within that time if your offer interests me and from there, I will send you a note that contains my email and you can email me the file when you're done

I don't like Deviantart anymore, I haven't for some time now

I don't want to leave anyone wondering what happened to me, so that's why I'm posting this

Thank you for reading and I appreciate your support